Comedy Poem #1: Lofty Struggles

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In a pub, a couple deep, saw a sign saying, ‘mind your head’
And due to drunken petulance I told it, “mind your own instead”,
It’s just a sign it doesn’t have one, that’s how I knew that I was fucked,
My 6 foot 3 mate strolled right through, 5’3 me tiptoed as I ducked.

Another time my height betrays me is when we’re warned to ‘mind the gap’,
Train to plaform’s been like triple jump, I’m mindful of that crap,
Cudda said getting off trains require run ups and parkour,
The joys of being more than 5 foot 2 and less than 5 foot 4

I can’t explain, of the all pain from all the training in the rain,
All the constant protein shaking became draining, hurt my brain,
All these gains, just to obtain a way from platform to the train,
Can’t think of any other way to tell you I’m 5’3 again.

Who even thinks to put the fucking ReadyBrek on the top shelf,
Embarrassing me in the aisle, look like some jumped up mental elf,
Not gonna climb or jump for porridge, I’ll treat myself to Special K,
This is me telling you I’m 5’3 in yet another way

Some say I talk down to myself, if I stretched more it could be true,
And if I’m talking down to you I guess you’re less than five foot two,
Now we’ve made it to the climax and here’s something you should know…..

I’m actually 5’2 and a half.

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© 2022| BINNZYtheWRITER |All Rights Reserved

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Alright people,

Been a while since I’ve been on here. I’ve started comedy and thought I may as well post the poetry I use in my sets here because, why not? No other context. This was the first one. Hope ya enjoy!

Happy New Year and all that.

And if you haven’t seen any of my stuff before, check some of em here

Breakthrough

Implementing Intent

Playing To Learn